Foodenator

Bored with the same old greasy potato chips?  Craving something salty that will leave a sticky mess on your fingers?

 
Ingredients:
-Butter
-Cheerios
-Hidden Valley powder ranch

1. Melt a few tablespoons of butter in a frying pan

5. With about 30 seconds left add in some Hidden Valley powder ranch, stir and pour into a bowl before the ranch burns

 
** Also great with powdered cheddar, sour cream & onion or salt.

Popularity: 23%

I have recently attended events ranging from cocktail parties, inaugural balls and the office break room fiesta where they were serving Ants on a Log. I have often wondered how to make this complex snack food. After months of testing different recipes, the staff at Foodenator has devised the perfect Ants on a Log recipe.

1. Select a fresh crisp batch of celery and cut into 6 inch long pieces
2. Spread a layer of peanut butter down the middle of the celery
3. Top off with raisin for the “ant” effect
4. Place on your best silver platter and serve with white gloves

Popularity: 19%

Foodenator eats more than it is possible to eat. This occurs often when eating pistachios. Foodenator does not hold a pistachio eating Guinness Record, yet. How does foodenator view pistachios

Pistachios require a little bit of work from the eater. Foodenator doesn’t find that appealing in a food. But all the work pays off in the end. During most pistachio openings, a pistachio nut is discovered. These pistachio nuts have a very refined taste. A pistachio is a really solid nut.

********* 9 (out of 10)

Popularity: 5%

When reviewing food for as discerning an audience as Foodenator’s, it is very important to correctly identify and correlate the actual food with the review being written. As a Foodenator critic, I would not want to write a review for Cousin Franco’s new lunch bistro while eating a sandwich purchased at SubGiant. It wouldn’t be fair to Cousin Franco or to Aunt Bottomtooth. In this case, I can’t even tell you what kind of apple this is. Gala? McIntosh? Hard to tell. So I am not going to review this apple. Instead I am going to draw all of you Foodenators into a vicious debate on the merits of neutering fruit.

This apple was carefully and deliciously dissected by underpaid Foodenator lab techs. No seeds were found. We looked on the outside, like you would find on a strawberry. No dice. No seeds either. We dove deeper, below the skin if you will. By the time we reached the core, morale has high. Surely we would spot seeds or seedsign. Our lead food engineer postulated the existence of “dark anti-seeds” that could indicate the location of the elusive seeds. But even analysis by gas chromatograph and magnifying glass could not locate any sexual organs whatsoever on this fruit. Obviously this fruit had been neutered at some point. The investigation continues… stay tuned.

Apple: ******** 8 (out of 10)
Neutered Fruit: * 1 (out of 10)

Popularity: 57%

(Review Brought to you By Pineappleope.com)

When you think of ‘cheating with chocolate’ usually, 9 times out of 10, only one thing comes to mind. Pineappleope.com has had a chance to review an up and coming diet people snack food, “Sensible Portion’s Cheating with Chocolate, S’mores with milk chocolaty drizzle.” At only 100 calories, this snack food has little chance to fill you up. Despite the low cal-count(R), this food still packs a weighty net weight of .84oz.

What Sensible Portions has done here is disguised a regular nickle sized rice cake, with low quality chocolate ‘drizzle’. If you are not a fan of rice cake, there is no chance you will enjoy these ‘Drizzled mini crisps.’ I found myself neither enjoying or un-enjoying myself during my experience with this snack food. The fake marshmallow flavoring in the s’mores variety was pretty awful and definitely justified the “artificially flavored” label on the packaging. My mouth tastes like a combination of stale wheat and plastic and black coffee.

Click below for the rest of the review, and final results
Read the rest of this entry »

Popularity: unranked